Distant Desires

We can travel the world with our thumbs

Place our fingers on the globe and let them run

Desperate to find a connection

Billions of people yet I can't find the one,

Whose right for me?

50% of the population I lust over

Yet how many lust for me?

Of that 50 it feels like 2 or 3.

The issue is not black and white

I spend my nights staring at black a yellow

Desperate for a fellow fag who is feeling rather frisky

A friend, a fiend, a deviant.

But of the few who are interested in me, they are interested in what I'm not

I prefer the other stuff while they just wanna fuck.

So of the 2 or 3, I'm only fit for one

Now I just have to try and find him

Looking for flame, something hot, I have the tinder and the matches but no sparks

Looking for a boy who is right for me, but all that's left are men who view me as a mouth

I'm not up for it, yet I'm down, falling into a deep depression.

I envision myself alone forever and forever alone.

Sure, I have friends and family, but without the one there is nothing

So boy where are you? The other side of the earth?

I'll search and I'll search, and I'll find you boy, that'll be my curse.

I think I finally found the one, and currently, it's great.

Electricity flows through us as we type

Eventually, we'll have to meet, were perfectly each other's type,

we get along, its meant to be

But there's just one thing…

The boy of my dreams lives a day away

So close, so far all at once and our life's taking us separate ways.

So I live in a nightmare where I'm forced every day, to know my happy future is just a day's drive away, yet the closest I'll get to him is when my thumbs type and say "you're the one for me, and I know it" yet we'll never be together, separated by circumstances and a border. But I'll know, the boy I love and who loves me is trapped within my screen, and if I could just join him there I could be free, free from the dread caused by being aware, my love, my friend, my boy will never be more than a thought in my head.

04/13/21